After a long day of work, I got home around 8:30 and proceeded to heat up a microwavable spicy black bean enchilada. I turned on the television and immediately heard Peter Griffin's annoying voice. Not in the mood for Family Guy. What else is on? 25 minutes to kill before The Office. Yep, I'm still on that train. What's this? A Pirates re-run on ROOT? Nice! I'm always in the mood to relive totally mediocre moments; it's why I've been to Panera Bread more than once. ROOT really came through for me here. The perfect Thursday night.
Let's set the scene: Pirates vs. Rockies. 6th inning. Bucs are down 2-1. The ageless Jamie Moyer on the mound. Casey McGehee on first base with 0 outs. Neil Walker comes up to the plate and...sacrifice bunts. OF COURSE. Neil "Clemente died so you can watch me bunt" Walker sac bunted to advance the runner for...Yamaico Navarro, Rod Barajas, Clint Barmes, and the pitcher. That prompted this wonderful exchange between the broadcasting team of Tim Neverett and Steve Blass:
Tim: The Pirates playing small ball here to get a run.
Steve: Good. You know, you can't fight city hall every time.
Thanks for the insight, fellas. Anyway, I probably don't have to tell you what happened next. Navarro actually singles, putting runners on 1st and 3rd. Hot Rod flies out to shallow right. McGehee tags up but thinks better of it because he is slower than a dining room table. Barmes comes up and gets the unintentional intentional walk. Bases loaded for All-Star Kevin Correia's (ASKC) spot. He's lifted for pinch hitter....Josh Harrison! The same Josh Harrison who has a career 56 wRC+ against lefties. I'd rather see ASKC take some hacks. Harrison weakly grounds out to 3rd to end the threat. Tim and Steve wonder what went wrong.
I still had about 10 minutes to kill, but I was already sick of it. I changed the channel. I don't even know what I started watching. Could have been Veronica's Closet. Could have been The 700 Club. I stared right through the TV, reliving every Barmes strikeout, every Bedard walk, every plate appearance wasted on Hot Rod, and every Jose Tabata caught stealing. And to cap off my disappointment, the enchiladas weren't even spicy.
18 days til pitchers and catchers.